NIGHTVISION

Fun in the snow.

Snowed-in weekend two weeks ago resulted in a trip to the park and a bit of filming :)

We're not looking for acceptance.

OS PIXADORES
When you create something you give it life...
you cant' control what it does or where it goes...
When I look at what we've done,
my heart starts to race... I can't sleep... it's all I think about
We see things differently.

They say, "Why do you risk your life? For this?"
The only way to push things forward is to risk something important.
Freedom.
We're all products of out environment.
By creating a language, we're making people think...
...ask questions.
Like any art, if you look at it long enough...
you find meaning.
Whether it's our meaning...
or yours.
They fear what we have to say.
So we speak.
We're not looking for acceptance...
We are Pixadores

You know christmas is coming...

You know christmas is coming when John Lewis put their advert out :)
#snowmanjourney

Wedding Fritters!

What could be better than photographing one of your best friend's weddings!? Okay...so maybe I wasn't the official photographer but I'd like to say I did a decent job of it. It was a beautiful wedding with close family and friends, and once again I'd just like to wish them all the best in their future together.

Little big planet.

Another competition entry James Kar has taken part in.
Please click on the link to watch and vote :)

https://apps.facebook.com/llbpkvideo/contests/294277/voteable_entries/60092731

Getting back to being me.

Two thousand and twelve has been a tough year for me. 
Luckily it's not over yet and I am determined to change it around. 
Dealing with bullyish behaviour for the past three years, I made the mistake of not talking to anyone who was impartial from the situation. The length of time meant that things started taking their toll, not just mentally but physically too. By not having anyone impartial to talk to I completely isolated myself and lost the chance of having someone who would be able to offer me the support and sanity that I needed.  

"The only thing worse than feeling bullied is to feel bullied and alone." 

Mike Leibling, Career Coach and Author.

As a result I lost me. I lost my confidence, my passion for the things I used to enjoy, and the ability to simply feel happy. I became a shadow of my former self.  On top of that, being so run down, my health started suffering. I was getting ill every month. 
Initially I had put up a front. I pretended everything was okay, avoiding any conversation that could lead to it, but this year I cracked, and had no other option but to start speaking about it to friends. They simply couldn't understand why everytime I saw them I was ill. That's when it all came out. 
The relief of talking to someone was such a weight lifted off my shoulders. I had started thinking that I was going mad, that I was being unreasonable with my thoughts. Turns out a lot of people have had to deal with similar situations and I no longer felt so alone.
The situation now hasn't really changed..in fact the person's behaviour has worsened, mostly because they're not getting the attention they used to get. 
The key difference for me now is that I am gaining the support I had originally been lacking and so it's slowly just becoming amusing rather than upsetting to see what the person comes up with next. You've got to look for every cloud and all that..

You can't choose your family, and you certainly can't choose your in-laws..especially sister in-laws.

My name is Aisha Chaudhary...

Just what I have been needing to see.

Important lessons:

1) Believe in miracles.

2) Live in the moment.

3) Do what you can.

4) Dare to dream.

Amazing Amazing Ad.

L'Odyssée de Cartier
'Discover the new Cartier film, a journey between dream and reality.
For the very first time, Cartier has decided to create a cinema epic focusing on its history, its values and inspiration, its artistic and universal scope.'

Directed by: Bruno Aveillan.

Dragon time..! :)

Happy New Year everyone :)
It's the year of the Dragon :)

It's been a good start so far with a lovely surprise present from someone at work :)

What a wonderful world.

A fun little video I stumbled across to get you into a creative mood :)

We met Santa..!

Last night after going to see We Are Augustines perform at the Wheelbarrow in Camden (an awesome show yet again), we had to get the train home. We got on one train but being somewhat knackered after being up since 5am I was wanting a seat. There was another train 1 minute behind so we got off at the next stop. Within seconds of the first train exiting through the tunnel the next one was arriving. As the train started slowing down I thought I was imagining things..but low and behold, it was Santa! Obviously knowing people wouldn't believe me, I have taken a photo :)

A couple sitting opposite did a rock paper scissors decision and then one asked if they could have a picture with him. 

Santa was everything we could have dreamed of, wishing us a Merry Christmas as he got off the train. 

Black rucksack, wooden cane, black ski gloves and an oyster card..we saw him walk off the train and exit the station through the barriers. It was magic.

Showreel time..!

If you're looking for a DOP then here's a showreel by Mr James Kar :)
LOVE it. I  must've watched it over a hundred times by now.


www.jameskar.co.uk
www.jameskar.co.uk/blog/

Fabergé Egg Hunt..!

200 Eggs.
LONDON.
The Big Egg Hunt.
21st February 2012.

We Are Augustines - The Photos

Here are the photos courtesy of James Kar Photography from the We Are Augustines launch party on the 7.11.11. It was an amazing night :)

 

To see more photos go to James Kar's blog.

For gifts you can't wait to give.

I've become increasingly intrigued with behind the scenes videos, and luckily for me there seems to be more and more of them out there. This one is for the making of the John Lewis Christmas Advert for this coming year. The advert tells a great story of a young boy desperately waiting for christmas, counting down the days. It's a lovely heart warming story with a little twist at the end.



To see the advert click here to go to Ad Lemon.

Chris Floyd - One Hundred and Forty Characters

An exhibition I have been to recently was Chris Floyd's - One Hundred and Forty Characters gallery opening near Old Street last Thursday. His inspiration came from realising that the people he tends to communicate with most on Twitter he had never actually met before. So in July 2010 he decided to start photographing the people he followed on Twitter. With no end date in sight it had been nearly a year since he had started photographing the people he follows. He added up the number of people he had photographed and it came to around one hundred and thirty which immediately showed him where to finish his project. One hundred and forty characters..the maximum number of characters in which you can communicate with other people on Twitter. Quite simple really. Result.. A lovely collection of portraits of the people he had never met before and only spoken to on Twitter.

If you have 14 minutes to spare (or you could just listen to it whilst it plays in the background..) here's a slideshow of all the portraits that were taken for the project with quite a fun audio of the people who took part giving their insights on Twitter.

Water and Dust

Saw this in the Metro today. Looks like a good exhibition to go to. Caroline Gibello. Water and Dust exhibition at Mufti in Kensington from 10th November 2011 till 10th January 2012. Amazing wildlife photography from Africa capturing some incredible animals. Think I will have to put a date in my diary.

Caroline Gibello - Heaven and Earth

This does remind me of another incredible African wildlife photographer I stumbled across well over a year ago though. Nick Brandt. His photos are really impressive and powerful to look at....his photos having stuck in my mind ever since I first saw them. Truly incredible and beautiful to look at.

Nick Brandt - Elephant With Exploding Dust, Amboseli 2004

Britain In A Day

Guys, this sounds amazing. Britain In A Day. Saturday November 12th 2011. Everyone is asked to pick up their camera and film a personal account of their day to be part of an amazing event/project.
"The question is not why you should take part, it's why not?"

For more info go to the BBC's Britain In A Day YouTube channel.

It's very exciting and there's only one day left to prepare...!

We Are Augustines

It's been a non stop few weeks. A mix of work and thankfully life. Last night was amazing. We went to the We Are Augustines' single launch party in Hoxton. It was invite only and @JamesKar managed to score us some tickets. It was a nice intimate affair. Got to meet and chat with the band after. Great bunch of guys. Nice and down to earth. I got them to sign my poster :)
This is one of my favourite songs..

So Near Yet So Far

First day back to work after a whole week off and it was hectic. So what better excuse than to head off to Tower Bridge to visit the Gorillas just to get away from it all. Only problem was, I had one hour to get there AND back. It was a bit of a long shot but I thought I'd try. The result.. I got all the way to Tower Bridge to realise I wasn't going to make it. Almost half an hour had gone and I was on the wrong side of the river. I could just make out the gorillas on the other side but there wasn't enough time and I had to head back to work. There was no other choice. Tower Bridge was just too wide and it would take too long to cross it. I should've crossed at London Bridge. I knew it. Though even if I had, there wouldn't have been enough time. It just meant I had to make another trip over there after work, which I did :) 20 gorillas all lined up waiting for their pictures to be taken. It was worth it.
(The photos will be coming soon.)

An English Channel..!

Arrived in Rouen today, the last stop on our journey home to London. We checked into our hotel, situated right in the centre next to Cathédrale Notre-Dame de Rouen. A great location, and next to all the shops. What more could you ask for? Well..after we got ourselves all checked in we went up to our room. As per usual the TV goes on, and after hardly seeing any TV (let alone any English speaking TV) in the ten days we've been away, we were amazed to find one. Which brings me to the reason I am writing this blog entry.. This delightful advert which came up not long after we'd turned the TV on.

France photo shoot: Day 3

It’s day three of our shoot in the South of France, photographing shawls for Madeline Trehearne & Harpal Brar. We’ve been staying in an old farm that has been transformed into an amazing home over the past twenty years (a real labour of love) surrounded by fields full of fruit trees and vine yards. It’s one of those places you see in magazines but never think you’ll go to. It’s quite surreal. There’s only one thing I don’t like..you can find them in corners of every room..but the less said about them the better.

We’ve come to France at the right time. Amazing sun, blue skies and a few fluffy white clouds floating in the sky. A lovely place to enjoy some peace and quiet, away from the usual London city bustle. Somewhere to escape, somewhere to relax. Though we must not forget we have a job to do. These shawls need photographing for next season’s catalogue (Collection 34) so the views will have to be admired later and the sun creates the perfect lighting for the shawls.

These shawls aren’t just any old shawls. They are the genuine article. Genuine Kashmir shawls, woven from authentic Pashmina cashmere. Each one is unique, so you’ll never find someone else with the same one making them all the more special. They are beautiful to look at and all made from completely natural materials. Some feature intricate hand embroidery created with pure silk. Others feature less intricate designs like stripes, block colours, and plain colours which are reversible. You can get blanket shawls which are quite nice and cosy too. When I get back I shall post up some photos from the shoot so you can see what I’m talking about. In the meantime, I better get back to work..! :/

Jungle City Edinburgh

Also this month..it looks like I need to plan a trip back up to Edinburgh. Lets hope I can.
In aid of the world's most endangered species here is the video about the Jungle City Edinburgh project.



This video below shows you more of the sculptures in their Scottish environment. I'll just warn you now.. it has very loud dramatic music, so you may want to turn the volume down.

Amazing (Gorillas) News Just In.

I have just found out that the gorillas will be making their way to London for the 16th - 22nd September! Sadly not all of them will be coming, just twenty but what a great chance to get some photos of the ones I missed in Bristol. Their location.. Tower Bridge. I will definately be going after work :)

The line up includes:

1. Blackbreadorilla 

2. Gorisambard

3. Fade To Black

4. Blackbeard Silverback

5. I Spy Gorilla 

6. Zoo Keeper

7. Seeing You, Seeing Me

8. Guerrilla Tourist

9. Sabyinyo

10. Elvis

11. The Forest Within

12. The S Express

13. Distinctly Different

14. Endangered PJ’s

15. Wow! Bristo

16. Jama

17. Custard

18. Spider Monkey

19. Bradisson

20. Gorilla Skelana

Wow! Gorillas

This summer Bristol Zoo Gardens celebrated its 175th anniversary with an army of life-sized gorilla sculptures designed and decorated by local artists. They formed a trail around Bristol's most famous landmarks, which is an added bonus for those who haven't explored Bristol before. Sadly for me, I only had one hour and one evening to find as many as I could. It was tough going round knowing there were so many nearby and that we wouldn't be able to get them all, but we got as many as was possible and atleast I actually got to see some. (Considering I didn't even know this event was happening..!) 

After their stint in the wild, these gorillas will then be put into a charity auction, raising money for Bristol Zoo conservation projects and Wallace and Gromit's Grand Appeal, which raises funds for the Bristol Royal Hospital for Children. The auction goes ahead on Thursday 29th September at 7pm.

Below are the photos of the gorillas I did manage to find :)

See No Evil

Over the last twelve months, plans were made which resulted in top graffiti artists around the world making their way to Bristol's Nelson Street where they have created Europe's biggest outdoor street art exhibition.
I only stumbled across this street art event by accident, two weeks ago when I stayed in Bristol overnight for a job. Having to book a hotel last minute the hotel we were hoping to stay at was fully booked so we settled for a different one. Fate is what I usually like to call these things. Not only did we stumble across Wow! Gorillas (Bristol Zoo Gardens celebration of it's 175th anniversary), we stumbled across the See No Evil street art event less than 30 seconds from the hotel we were now staying in. It could not have been a better result.
I have always had an interest in street art but after the initial increase in awareness 10yrs ago have been somewhat put off by how much interest it has been given as it has got to the point where street art is now being protected by perspex within days of it going up. (In the second photo you can see CCTV has been installed.)

Photos courtesy of Street Art London.

Okay, so yes, clearly it is a Banksy, BUT street art is not meant to be about money. Street art is not meant to be encased, hence why they are found on the streets and not in galleries. Although that line has also been crossed. For me, street art is for the people. Not to be owned by individuals.
I could go rambling on about this issue but I will stop, as I was meant to be writing about Bristol's See No Evil project.
More than 70 artists took part in transforming the area which the Bristol City Council, after having invested £80'000, hopes will impact on increasing the tourism numbers therefore boosting the local economy. Artists included El Mac from LA, Tats Cru from New York, Inkie from Bristol itself and other artist from Spain, Brazil, Holland and the rest of Britain.
The project completed on Saturday 20th August 2011 with an event consisting of a showcase of local music and art involving DJ's, bands and street theatre. I wish I could have been there but sadly I was all the way back in London Town. I hope I get to go back and visit soon.
Here are some of my photos when I was in Bristol on my oh so fleeting visit:

UK's latest sensation.

It's that time of year again... X Factor! This time round with a whole new panel of judges (bar the exception of Louis Walsh). Gary Barlow, Kelly Rowland and Tulisa Contostavlos. Anyway.. It seems they may have found an amazing contender as this years winner of X Factor in the form of 16 year old Janet Devlin from a tiny village in Ireland. All I can say is.. Truly amazing, captivating and breath taking. Here is the moment she auditioned..



To see the full audition travel on over to here.

Janet already has her own YouTube channel (Janet Devlin) where she has recorded a whole host of covers.
Below is her cover of To Make You Feel My Love by Bob dylan.




I wish her all the best and that she doesn't lose sight of who she is.

Miracle Day

So who's watching Torchwood this year? It's SERIOUSLY intense. The end of episode five has left me with a very uneasy, and unable to comprehend state of mind. I don't think I've watched anything with a storyline quite like this.
This season, Torchwood explores death being eliminated from the equation of life, amongst the human race. Can you imagine if that actually happened? People just stop dying. The ones who should have died..they don't. They carry on living, despite their injuries and illnesses (including decapitation). Meanwhile on the other end of the scale...millions of babies are still being born into the world everyday. The population multiplies at an alarming rate. Even abortion is no longer possible. What are the consequences? What does this lead on to? Well..I suggest watching Torchwood just to get to grips with what I'm trying to explain. It's a fascinating storyline which makes you think.

Spoiler Alert:
I'm struggling to get my head round the end of episode five. After watching the story unfold you understand that death is impossible. However they can still suffer the pain depending on the injury. Given the amount of deathly accidents/illnesses that occur each day..space is running out in all the hospitals. New laws are being passed to reclassify the patients. A patient classified as category one is the new 'dead'. One of the criteria being that the patient is unconscious. Patients are being transported to camps and segregated. The 'dark secret' behind these camps is that the plan for the category ones is to incinerate them. 
What happens at the end of episode five is one of the characters, who was completely alive (obviously) and healthy gets shot. To cover it up she ends up being placed in one of the incinerators. She regains consciousness as the incinerator gets turned on. As death is impossible..this means she is burnt alive and (I'm guessing) reduced to ash..yet she cannot be dead. Death is impossible. 
So this must mean she carries on existing as particles of ash?? Is that what is happening? She will continue living..but as bits of ash? I find it hard to comprehend and have literally just come to the conclusion that she wouldn't be in pain in her new state, as this state would not involve pain...as she is not being constantly burnt... ?? I am confused. Would she be in pain? Would she not be in pain? She WOULD have to be alive right? Death is not in the equation.. Yet her body and functions are all just ash... So she must then be unconscious? But then the form of ash is...... Does that mean she IS dead? But then death is not possible. Is that a loop hole?

I thought the ear muffs on the baby was a nice touch.

Strange Fruit

I've just realised..I did a post about James Kar being published in 101 TOP TIPS FOR DSLR VIDEO but never actually posted the video that is featured so here it is..

There's also a fun behind the scenes video which I have posted below.
Enjoy.

WHAT IS VA VA VOOM?

LOVE.
LOVE THIS.

WHAT IS VA VA VOOM?
IS IT MORE? - Audrey Hepburn
OR LESS? - Dita Von Teese
I could've been a contender.
DOES IT SMOULDER? Marlon Brando
I could've been somebody.
DOES IT BURN BRIGHTLY?
Ground control to major tom -  David Bowie
IS THERE A QUEEN OF IT?
It's so good being bad - Rhianna
BIEN SUR.
VIVE LA RENAULT CLIO

Someone Like You

Simple really.
A beautiful song.



This is the first time I've actually seen the video. Whenever I hear this song I always think of the end of Secret Diary of a Call Girl. It was very emotional.

"We can't regret our choices. The past is behind us. All we have is the present.. and the future. Whatever that may bring."

Little dog lost.

The train was approaching the platform when I started to hear the noise of little paws running along the platform. It was a little white highland terrier. He was just running around going up to people's legs and looking up a them all happy but expectant. He'd clearly been out all night. He was very wet and slightly muddy.

We had to get on the train. It was heartbreaking. The train arrived and he waited by the door looking unsure what to do. A gentleman made sure he didn't get on the train as who knows where the little dog would end up. It was so upsetting watching the doors close, knowing he'd be left outside at the end of the platform alone. If he'd turned up before the train arrived I could have found a station warden. There would have to have been someone somewhere who could look after him. I hope he's okay and that the next person who arrived at the platform found someone at the station who could help find who he belonged to so he could get home.



Be safe little dog. Find your way home.

Smokers.

I hate when you smoke whilst walking and then it blows all over me.

I hate that you smoke.

Was it just bad behaviour?

The Major of London announced today that any young person involved in the London riots will lose their free travel, but can earn it back. I simply retweeted with the question "Why can they earn it back?!" Seconds later I had a reply from someone saying "If you want people to behave, incentives and the ability to rehabilitate themselves give them reasons to try." I guess that makes sense..but I don't believe this is about making people behave. People involved in the riots weren't just misbehaving because they didn't know any better. They were taking advantage of the chaos and just doing what they felt like whilst knowing it was wrong. They don't need rehabilitating..they've not suffered a moment of insanity or breakdown. They've not been brought up not knowing what's right from wrong. You see videos of ppl asking the rioters/looters why they were doing it..because they "were owed it". They were "getting their taxes back". They were simply taking advantage to get back what they felt they were owed.

People lost their homes and their possessions that cannot simply be replaced. They were innocent victims. Why should the people involved in the London riots be able to earn their free travel back? It was a privilege in the first place, and well..the people who lost their homes can't just get their homes back. Losing free travel is a small loss and it is only a small consequence to their actions. A small life lesson.

Things can't always just be fixed so easily.. Should they not learn that?

Short But Sweet.. @JamesKar

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SISTER BEAR

Just wanted to wish my sister bear a very happy birthday. I don't get to see her so much anymore as she moved back to Sweden a few months ago. I miss her, but I am happy for her as she is moving on to bigger and better things. I love you sister bear and hope you have a very lovely birthday.
Happy Birthday! xxx

I Need Some M.O.T.I.V.A......

I joined the gym in March this year. It's been four months and after two it became a struggle. The first two months were good. There was an incentive:

Visit the gym 20 times in eight weeks and get the (extortionate) administration charge back. 

The good thing was it also included x3 personal trainer sessions. So yeah.. That was good enough motivation as that money could be spent on much more important things...... ;) I completed the 20 sessions (just) and then rewarded myself with a week off from the gym. This may have turned into being a few weeks off as I only went once in June. July has been slightly better..more like once a week..and occasionally twice. My reason: I need to wash my hair so I'll make it really worthwhile and get all sweaty beforehand. It's an excuse and it works....half the time. 
To sum up. I have decided I need to find a better reason for going to the gym other than..I need to wash my hair.

Help?

My Hero

It's 5am in the morning and I lift up a bag in my bedroom and there's a GINORMOUS spider. Obviously the fear goes right through me and it is THE SCARIEST thing on EARTH. Thankfully @JamesKar is around and can save me. As expected..the spider ran away under the big drawer unit I have but James, having been forced to wake up, got everything out from underneath and did a thorough search until he found it and saved me and my bedroom from it. My hero indeed :)

Get Ready..Go.

At the beginning of my day I saw a funny yellow car. Ten minutes later I saw a funny bright green car. 

On my way home at the very end of my day I see a woman wearing a very yellow top and some very yellow tights. She then puts on a very bright green jacket.

Thank Yous.. To Those Who Don't Even Know

People try and bring you down. Make you doubt yourself. But you know what? The rest of the world shows you it's lies without you even asking. I thank those ppl. Though they don't even realise they've done anything.

101 TOP TIPS FOR DSLR VIDEO

Exciting news! James Kar has been published in this book and it's actually a pretty good read. Congrats, congrats :)

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Chinese New Year started on Thursday 3rd of February this year, so just wanted to say Gong Xi Fa Choi to anybody out there who sees this :) xx

TWITTER KNITTER

It was an awfully cold but beautiful christmas. But I could not forgot the ppl I saw on the streets of London. I don't know how they did it. Me with my layers and coat looking forwards to getting home and out of the cold, shivering like mad. The homeless stuck on the streets, nowhere to go, hoping not to be moved on and to make it through the night. How they did I am amazed as I could see them using cardboard boxes as covers. It is shocking, sad and crazy that there are still so many homeless ppl in this day and age. I just wanted to highlight a fun project I noticed over the christmas period called TWITTER KNITTER..maybe a bit late to say it now..but better late than never.
Saint and RKCR/Y&R collaborated together to help the homeless in Camden keep just that little bit warmer over christmas. All you had to do was tweet a phrase on twitter with the tag #WarmUpCamden at the end and they would then knit the winning tweets onto scarves which would then be handed out.

The World..

One more thing..

Those who have not done so yet..please visit: 

http://patricktheoptimist.org/

Very inspirational and doing the kind of project I love..something with a real purpose behind it. He has motor neurone disease and is gradually losing the ability to do anything yet he is using his story to create awareness of this disease and has set himself the challenge "to draw the portraits of 100 incurable optimists" before he loses his ability to paint at all. Please go visit the site just to find out more. :)

Loving this on the Tube

Has anyone else noticed the fun true or false posters put up by transport for london on the tubes?? I'm actually loving them. Very intriguing indeed. Especially the one about the spiral escalator in 1907..and the first one that I saw saying only two tube stations have all the vowels in their names.. Still wanting to double check that myself, and so I have grabbed a tube map specially to do just that. Now all I need to do is make some time for it. For those who want to find out now...then here's the link for the answers: TUBE OR FALSE?

25

Isn't it funny. At 25 I was supposed to be married and with kids on the way. Well that was what we all said to each other when we were kids at primary school. Funny how far off being 25 used to feel, but now we're actually there and being at primary school doesn't seem that long ago. It's all gone so quickly. We always used to feel so grown up back then. Now we see little kids and even the teenagers and still think they're really young with so much to learn about life and growing up. I guess wanting to be married with kids at this age was so unrealistic back then. Or maybe it was realistic..just now it seems unrealistic. Times have changed a lot. Careers being put first..and well it being harder to get on the property ladder. Plus the whole belief in marriage having deteriorated as the decades go by. (I hope that's not un unfair thing to say). I think I'm saying that because you see it in the papers all the time..marriages..then infidelities..then ppl marrying again for the second or third time. It seems like marriage just doesn't have the same meaning/values as it used to these days. In my world now..being a little bit more realistic..ideally two or three more years until kids. Tho that's just being a little more realistic. To be completely realistic.. Who knows when. Maybe even another decade. Who knows if it will even happen. Can't really see it happening in two or three years. Plus I'm still not ready. Times really have changed. Tho saying that.. I know alot of ppl who are getting married and have kids. Tho at the same time I know a lot of other ppl who aren't and don't and ppl who are older too. I guess the main thing I'm thinking about is how old I will be when my children are say 20. I'd want to be at a good age. So if I want to be no older than 50 when they were 20 it would have to be by the time I'm 30 at the latest. So I guess I can still be hopeful..there's still time and no need to worry..well not yet anyway. 

Think I'm Just Gona Have To Accept Defeat

So the other day I was looking at my plant as I was really happy to see it was growing to the point where it would flower again.. I was especially excited as I heard its really hard to get Orchids to flower again and well..we'd had this Orchid plant from last year and I was about ready to give up all hope on it.  So I was looking at it..may have been touching it a teeny bit and well..next thing I knew.. it was hanging off and when I went to see properly..it just completely fell off in my hands..!! :(

This was very upsetting and I had no idea what to do. For some reason I thought I could still save it. It was only just freshly off and I thought it could be possible to attach it back on. I mean it had only come off for a few seconds.. So I went and got my first aid kit from my room and thought maybe I could attach it back using some tape.. As you can see below in the photo it looks quite promising :) 

The following day I gave it some sugar water and checked it's progress.. It all still looked pretty hopeful...but now..a few days later..and well..the flower bit was pretty droopy and I decided I should just take it off and see if the end of the living bit could somehow start growing by itself again. Fingers crossed! Starting to get attached to this plant after all the drama and first aid care I've tried giving it but I guess we shall just have to wait and see what happens..

Please don't die on me Orchid plant.

Popcorn

Today is the day I learnt how to cook popcorn. And I was pretty good at it..if a fire is what you want to create and if you need to go somewhere smelling of burnt popcorn. Or..if you want a smokey hazy looking room. It was a success in the way that all the kernals were popped and there was a plate full of popcorn. Taste was a bit of something that should maybe be acquired with age.. It had a very distinct taste of burnt paper/charcoal..which did not get better with each piece one carefully selected from the popcorn ashes to see if there was atleast one nice tasting piece of popcorn to make the whole thing worth while. So to sum up my little experience..
It never got any better and I have decided there is only one thing left for future popcorn endeavours: Buy them ready popped. :)

Family

It must be quite nice to have a family. You all do different things but all working together. Someone always around when you want to talk about something. Someone always there. I don't know. I've never really experienced it. Is it always nice? Or am I just seeing the best bits from ppl who have family around and at home? I know ppl always say it's nice to have your own time to yourself but you can still get that right??
Can't wait to get one of my own. Tho saying that..I don't know if I will as you never know what will happen..but I hope that I do. Wonder if I'm running out of time tho? Well what will be will be. If it's meant to happen then it will. I believe in fate..and I hope my fate is good.    

The sky is blue.

Life is good when you realise what you've got and you are happy. All you have to do next is enjoy what you've got. Right now I'm lying in the amazing sun in my garden and listening to songs playing off my iPod. Feels like it could be heaven.
What an amzing blue sky.  

Past, Past and Past.

The past is the past. That's what they say. But then why does it still
manage to haunt us? You feel like there's no escape. The past is not
the present and it hasn't been for quite a while. Yet ppl don't seem
to be able to see it. Some still think it's the same. Some still try
to drag you back. There doesn't seem to be anything one can do about
it. Not in this case anyway. There seems no hope to be able to leave
it behind. It seems the past will just haunt for the rest of the
foreseeable future. How do you make ppl think differently? How do you
make ppl see what's now? Should you leave them behind too? Sometimes you just wana escape. Be free from it. No judgement from the past. Fresh. New. Real. But can you really leave those ppl behind?
And then there's the other type of past you want to leave behind. The one that effects who you are. The one that holds you back. The one that
never seems to let you free. What do you do about that? Who can you
speak to? Who can you tell your biggest worry to without fear of
alienating yourself? You can't tell anyone cos it could become the
reality. It could happen. You don't want to think it. But it's there
at the back of your mind. What if it's true? But there's no one you
can tell. It scares you. But you should never say. Never. Until it
does come true. But if it does..you wouldn't know it anymore.

Along came Barry

So today has been a much happier work day..the first one in what feels like ages..though started off slightly badly.. It had been building up from yesterday..the realisation about the way certain ppl work and their attitudes not being what you first thought they were..came to a bit of a crunch when I finally just couldn't hold it in anymore and just told them to stop creating extra work for themselves if they are already saying they have so much to do..and are then wasting time doing things that are un-necessary!! After that I went and found Arli and had a little rant about it and felt alot better :) 
Anyway..enough of that and back to my day at work..
So it up picked up after I finished lunch..where I then went and did miki's staff purchase for her and decided I would avoid going back to the office to do my work and stayed to help out on tills for a bit :) Oh how I miss being on the floor with everyone around and being on tills. If I could spend all day on tills I think I probably would. After about twenty minutes I forced myself off the floor as I did have a lot to do and felt alot happier..odd I know..but I enjoy it! Well as long as the customers are friendly :) The rest of the day seemed to go quite fast from that point onwards..and freaky thing happened where I was literally just thinking ahh I'm gona need to get a signature from the bean when he's next in on the weekend and literally less than a second later (no lies!) he walked in. Genius. He helped make the last hour go quickly too and then FINALLY! (although it was just two minutes before I finished work..) Barry! turned up..who I had been calling and waiting to turn up for weeks (a month to be precise) and so I took him to see the dead pigeon that's been in the electric cupboard for a month now..along with the dead mouse (which he confirmed is actually a baby rat) that has been there for well over a year. Surprisingly the pigeon..according to Barry..still looked quite fresh..which leads onto my theory about the electric cupboard having some sort of deadly gas or time stopping vacuum in there..always hate going in there..I try and avoid it as much as I can and not that long ago actually got myself trapped in it after something heavy fell across the door outside and I couldn't actually get out until some one eventually heard me banging on the door and shouting for help. Did not help that the noisy as ever heater was on therefore drowning out the sounds of my voice. I could've been trapped in there for ever! (yes slight over exageration on length of stay going on there..but I thought I should create a bit of drama about that..was bloody scary tho..was just about ready to start really panicking and getting hysterical). Anyway..back to Barry..he said he'll send some guys round to clear up and sterilise he electric cupboard as there is shit (excuse my choice of word) EVERYwhere..you'd think the room had been painted green..and they'll be coming tomorrow. Yay! I also may have mentioned to him about the cockroach I came across last Thursday in the ladies loo.. NOT a middle aged (as in not baby..not full grown adult sized one) that I thought it was..me being used to the masssive ones you get in Malaysia..so it was in fact a full grown adult one where the females can lay 32 eggs at a time.. Apparently there is quite the cockroach problem in the area due to some bad drains which they come up from..but Barry assured me the restaurants were clear and safe to eat at.
Okay..I really must go as I've spent my whole tube journey writing this and walked all the way home without looking and am about to be stood outside my door..
Hope I didn't stand in any dog crap.. 

Spoilt Rotten

Omg..just watching the opening to panorama on bbc one tonight is shocking. WHAT THE HELL. It is shocking that ppl let this happen to their own children in the first place.

The poor kid had to have eight (or was it nine?) molars removed because she consumes a large bottle of ketchup a day and lots of sweets.

Ha..if you smoke..indoors or out..you cannot go near your kid for a good few hours after and need to shower and change your clothes first..as it can effect your child's hearing. I like that bit of info..I did not know that at all. I can use that in my campaign to stop my friends smoking.
One guy refuses to stop smoking as he doesn't believe it..despite his son's hearing problems. He smokes in the house.

A five year old is so over weight he struggles with walking home and his mother has to bring a wheelchair to get him the rest of the way home..he's FIVE years old..and weighs the same amount as a seventeen year old boy. The mother blames it on genetics.. Not his over eating (albeit healthy).. Or his lack of physical activity.

A three year old who's teeth has rotten has to have his baby teeth removed..at least his mum feels bad about it and is going to do something about it now..although she's just been for a cigarette..

It is tough bringing up a child..but I think a parent's attitude and behaviour does make a big difference. You need to have some level of discipline as its not just about the now..it's about their future too. I think you need to be aware of the consequences of your actions. I just hope I don't make the same mistakes.

Out with the old..in with the new.

So the weekend so far has involved a lot of file transferring and deleting of old files. Still got a lot to go through..but I'm getting there. Hoping by end of today it should all be done. Its crazy how much stuff you forget until seeing files and photos reminds you. Some stuff I would rather forget..like seeing a certain photo and remembering why I don't like being 'pushed'. Though I guess you wouldn't need a reminder to remember you don't like that..but it's funny how your mind can block certain things out. What is that? Self preservation? I think it's something like that. I'll look it up after this..but anyway! There are a lot of nice memories too. I take a lot of photos..so I have quite the collection of funny photos of my friends..some which they may now find embarrassing :) but I won't be cruel and post them up..unless I already have..which does remind me that someone has a very priceless photo of another certain someone that I still need to obtain for my own viewing pleasure :)
So to sum up my weekend..it is a lot of out with the old which can only be a good thing.
A year ago is when things all started to change..and I couldn't be happier.

So my hair may go orange?

I thought this week would never end. Monday feels like a month ago and Tuesday had already felt like Thursday. I did manage to achieve a few things that made my week worth it like getting my iMac on the monday :) Am very happy..especially as I am now starting to get the hang of it again and I have the whole weekend which I intend to take easy to play around with it. Need to do a lot of file transferring and the most important files will be my photos. Can't wait to get them on here.
So to sum up my week..Monday I went to brent x and got my iMac with the help of some of my friends..and then went to nandos and then home to set it all up. Tuesday..the best bit about it was my dinner..lamb fajitas..which oh my..tasted amazing. Took some to work for lunch the next day. Wednesday..after work I went out with some friends for dinner and milkshake in a very american style restaurant. The food came in baskets which made me feel like I should be at some kind of american football game..and I guess getting a hot dog added to the effect. Thursday..after work we tried to go for milkshake but for some reason it just wasn't meant to be as the first place was unable to make them..and the second was closed so we ended up wandering around in the sun which was still quite nice. Thursday was also the first time I actually got to play around with my iMac properly and I started designing my name as a symbol which is my first little design project that I have set myself to do properly and have fun with..and tonight..well I need some rest so that I can be sure I'll be more productive over the weekend.
It's been a long week..but seeing my friends helped me get through it.

Oh and in regards to the title..the deep red colour my hair was dyed to I think is starting to fade and my hair may be getting a tiny bit lighter..don't think it will actually go orange though. It's still too dark for that..well I hope so anyway.

Happy Easter

I couldn't find the lil chick thing I have to take a photo of it and use to create an image..so instead I found an old bunny drawing and put this together really quickly..

A Failure to Distinguish

Hurt & Anger. Why do so many ppl think it means the same thing??
Support & Love. The two don't always come hand in hand. 
Friends & REAL friends. The ones who know you pretty much as well as you know yourself and can accept you for who you are and don't try to change you..well unless it is for the best. They'll stand by you through everything.

I'm not sure how to say what I want here. There's so much that I don't even know where to begin. I think that at the end of the day..your real friends know who you are and can accept you for whatever you do and with an understanding behind why you do things. It's so easy for ppl to presume that just because you're upset it means you're angry also..but it's hardly ever the case. Anger if it does..will come from how you are responded to. (This probably won't make sense as I have various senarios in my head and am mixing the stories together..but let's carry on and see how this turns out.) Ppl can be very defensive about themselves..which means they can get so caught up in it that they then miss what the real situation is. The real thing they need to realise is..why would this person be 'attacking' me and the answer is..they wouldn't. Therefore what is the real situation? This person is upset..confused. They need reassurance..they need to understand..some advice..or they just need some comfort. It's not about you..it's about them. If that isn't realised..then that is how the argument starts. The person comes to you upset/hurt..you think they're upset with you..you think it's your fault..you think they're blaming/accusing you..you get angry..you get defensive..you retaliate it back on them..they get more upset..and then they themselves could end up becoming defensive..they're not being understood..they're now being accused of things..and it becomes a whole big massive cycle..everything gets blown out of proportion. Then what was the argument about? That's no longer the issue.. It is so easy for that to happen and it is so common. I'm just glad I know this and having known this I think it does make a big difference. Though in general I don't think I'm a very defensive person. If someone doesn't like me well then it's not my problem..I'm not gona try and make someone like me. You have to take me as I am. I guess I find this easy to say as I'm luckily in the position that I do have a lot of friends..and most of them understand me. I love my friends. They can rely on me and I can rely on them. There's a level of trust where it's only ever good intentions so guards can be let down. 
Be true to yourself..don't worry what ppl think..not if you're a genuine person.       

Chocolate Festival

So aswell as going to london for the Earth Hour..we also went so we could go and see the Southbank Chocolate Festival! It was smaller than I expected but there were still loads of stalls to go look at. I managed to restrain myself from buying lots of chocolate..but could no longer give in after staring at the pancake stall for what was probably the fifth time! I did not regret it tho..it was AMAZING. I may have been slightly greedy and had chocolate sauce added to the banana and nutella pancake I had chosen..but why not? It was a chocolate festival after all..and atleast I hadn't given up chocolate for lent :)

Here is the link to some of my photos from the festival :)
Choc Fest.

Earth Hour

So Earth Hour on Saturday 27th March 2010 was a success. There was a great atmosphere and alot of ppl were around to witness the lights turning off at the various places that were taking part.

We went round london visiting as many sites as we could on foot. Starting off at picadilly for the count down we then went through leceister square to get to trafalgar square and then walked down to big ben. It was great fun and hope you like the video made by James Kar Photography :)

BTW..I have put my photos up on tumblr as there are a fair few..(from Picadilly Circus, Big Ben and Big Ben from across the river)..but here is the filming by James Kar Photography of the event. Hope you enjoy it. :)

Musings

I wonder what its like to be an image..a photo. I thought at first I meant camera..but no..I mean the result. Sometimes images work better..when they're not on their own.

The Chocolate Festival & Earth Hour

So today I am going to the southbank chocolate festival! How exciting is that?! Just seen a mini video of the highlights of it that someone randomly sent me on twitter. Looks amazing and like I will be spending lots of monies! We're gona be making two trips to the chocolate festival today :) One in the late afternoon..and then again at night after the Earth Hour at 8.30pm where eveyone is supposed to turn off all their lights to help save the environment. It's crazy how much difference just an hour can make and shows how much unneccesary energy we waste most the time just by leaving lights on. So anyone who is reading this..in general..please just make sure you're turning the lights off when you don't need them. Thank you :) Well I better go now as I have to go get ready! Really looking forward to today :) and of course I am sure I will be posting photos up soon.

Catch-22

I think it was near the end of last year..or maybe it was around the start of this year..I finally started reading Catch-22 by Joseph Heller. It was something I had been meaning to do for ages. 
It was quite a hard book to grasp at the beginning..as I don't think I have ever read a book written in this way before. It was only until around page 32 that it suddenly all just clicked and I finally understood how to read it. From then on the book just suddenly became hilarious to read and I did not want to put it down. My only dilema then was whether or not I should go back and start again to get the bits I'd failed to get from the beginning but I was just too eager to read more. Sadly for some strange reason..I guess I just became busy and everything all started getting a bit hectic..I no longer had the time to read it despite really wanting to. Thankfully I now have the time and I have started reading it again and I have started from the beginning! This time I'm able to understand and get my head round it right away and am getting the bits I missed.
The bits I've been enjoying so far are actually I think mostly to do with Doc Daneeka. The first part that really amused me about him was when he first tells us of Catch-22. Then there's the part about how he had declared himself unfit for war..HILARIOUS..and then the part I've just finished reading about the newlyweds..which I still don't understand the reasoning behind why he gets punched in the nose! Ahh..I'm wondering if somehow this will be explained later on in the book but I'm not so sure it will be. I've got a lot of this book left to read as I'm still very near the start but I'm sure I'll probably write more about it soon. Ahh I can't wait to get back to reading it but I need to go cook myself some dinner first and use the egg that I broke earlier thinking it was a boiled egg. Was not impressed as it made a bit of a mess..but I managed to save most of it. Go me! :)      

Purple Chocolate Heart

I can't eat it because it looks so pretty.